There aren't any words, only tears and yet, also a smile as I know the struggle and she's breathing free and easy now. Wonder if she and Phil are having a sit-down right now and catching up. I'd like to think so.
Jackie's passing is a huge loss to the COPD community and this extended family; one that can never be filled.
Larger still is the loss to her family. Dave, Stacey and all of the family, to simply send my deepest condolences just doesn't cut it and yet, I have no other words. You are an incredibly strong family and saw her through the bad times and enjoyed the good times with her as well. When the tears start to dry, hopefully the good times will start to keep you warm.
Post by Sue in Ontario on Jul 9, 2014 14:00:09 GMT -5
Thanks John for the post!I appreciate aa the support on the forum and remember Jackies advice the 3yrs I joied the forum.Jackie was such an inspiration!Thanks and looking forward to chatting with the forum soon!
To inform Mary 57 I needed to email her as she is at her summer camp and has no internet . She asked me to post her response From Mary 57 ;John, Oh my God, no I didn't know. Thank you so much for letting me know. I do know that she was having great difficulties but had hoped she would be able to regain some more ground. It was God's will to call her home and end her suffering. It is for us to mourn our loss, and give thanks for knowing such a wonderful woman. Please pass on my heartfelt sympathy to Dave and their family. They will be in my prayers.
Post by chrocary / Jane on Jul 10, 2014 9:29:20 GMT -5
Our lives go on without you But nothing is the same We have to hide our heartache When someone speaks your name Sad are the hearts that love you Silent are the tears that fall Living without you is the hardest part of all You did so many things for us Your heart was so kind and true And when we needed someone We could always count on you The special years will not return When we are all together But with the love in our hearts You walk with us forever
Thank you for posting that for me John. We have no internet and very sketchy cell service here. I am in town to get on here today.
I feel so very lost knowing that Jackie is gone, but know that she is breathing easy and pain free now. Liz and I are praying for her family's, both at home and here with us. May we all be comforted by having known such a beautiful soul, and knowing she is at ease.
Dear Family, friends, acquaintances and the curious. Each of you knows the category you fall within so I need not elaborate. Thank you for being here today to help celebrate my life and to add some comfort to my family.
This would not be my preferred way of having the last word; or even getting your undivided attention but; I guess you go with what you’re dealt and it’s not like a have a choice right now.
By now you may have met Ted here (you know; the ones that’s reading this) but if you haven’t….
Brother Ted; as he’s known by many, is a very good friend of Dave’and mine from Macon Ga. In April 2007 I asked him if he would come up and do a form of service when this day came. (For those of you who are wondering; he’s very qualified) He agreed without hesitation. That’s what friends do I guess. You see I don’t believe in the “Rent A Church” scenario if I wasn’t an active member, and for a “priest” who may have never met me to say a mass….Well; that would be dieing a lie. One thing I NEVER did; was LIVE a lie; why would I do it now.
Ted is the Director of La Ermita, a Hermitage in Macon; it’s a spiritual, social works and outreach type centre primarily for the Hispanic community there. Perhaps he brought some business cards? Ted can also be a tad bit eccentric at times (sorry; but I do get the final say ) but we love him nonetheless and in reality I WAS d**nED proud to call him my friend and grateful for his willingness to come. After all; he’s not a spring chicken though he looks pretty good!
Hmmmmmmm Celebrate my life. Take it from me it was full; and it was good; and at this point I’m not about to lie now am I? Incidentally; I hope I don’t bore you too badly monopolizing this conversation BUT this IS about me today. Sorry; couldn’t help myself.
There’s not much I didn’t do in my 60 years. I probably lived more, did more, experienced more than the majority of people who even hit. 90. I’ve started up and owned several businesses, I’ve been a writer and member of the Canadian Author’s Association, I’ve rubbed shoulders with my share of dignitaries…..Dave use to say that I “Could eat with Kings and drink at the Bruin Inn” He was right and though I was, or could be comfortable in a business suit or gown, I was at home in a shirt, jeans, sneakers or rubber boots.
I’ve traveled a fair bit ( a great deal of it with Dave and the kids); I was even the one primarily responsible for uprooting the kids in their early teens and relocating to another country. And; as it turned out; it was a good move for everyone. I use to always say to the kids when it came to new challenges to “Think if it as an adventure”. They came to HATE that word and in later years use to use it on me. What goes around comes around I guess. KARMA; the Universal Law of Retribution. In their case I’m sure they were thinking….”payback is sweet!”
My life was filled with so much over the years and in all honesty I have few regrets. I’d even considered having “I Did It my Way” played here today. That’s how I lived….it may not have always been the “right” way in the opinion of some, but it was MY way.
My latest accomplishment, and the one for which I’m very proud was creating COPD Canada…Patient Network. Dave felt what I was doing and building there would be my “epitath”. He’s right and I‘ve made provisions for it to carry on as a not for profit and charitable organization run by COPDer’s across Canada.
Don’t know what COPD is? Hopefully by the time you leave here today you will. There are brochures here that will inform you.. There’s 750,000 “known” cases of this progressive disease and that many again probably that’s undiagnosed or misdiagnosed. One of the diseases within that umbrella term you might know as Emphysema but there’s also a few others that fill in the category. Like I said it’s progressive and there’s no cure. BUT; it can quite often be managed.
You see I’ve had a wonderful opportunity to touch and assist hundreds personally, plus help thousands through my website and organization. One patient with a disease, that’s where it began. I did that. The kind of help I know that I’ve given; the friends I’ve made through this disease, and the support I’ve received……I was truly a lucky woman!
I’ve accomplished a lot more in my life; but probably my BIGGEST triumph was having the kids then later on meeting and marrying Dave. Those 3 stood with me; they covered my back; and supported me through all the “adventures”. ( Just so that e’one knows however; these adventures were ALL positive ones I might add)
You know they say that health is more important than wealth…..and it is. But let me tell you something….if you don’t have family to love, and that you love, and/or the love of true friends, even health as a wealth could be debatable. Who would or could you share yourself with or the important things in life? Make time, spend time …. SHOW your love, GIVE your love and LIVE your love! It’s the BIGGEST gift with the cheapest price tag.
Don’t think of my being “only” 60….don’t think of the “number” because that’s all it is ….”a number”. It’s what I did with those years and what “you do” with the years you have. I filled mine till it was gushing over the top. Maybe when you leave here today you’ll had caught a cupful of it.
Ben, Stacy, Dave….I’ve written you letters which you may or may not have read by now. Not that I needed to because we were gifted in that we “said” all of the things that “should have been said” and “shared” over the years. The most important things we always verbalized in our family ……the “ I Love Yous” We also said and showed each other the …. “I’m Proud of You.” Think of the folks who don’t “say the words” or “Show” how they feel” So Sad isn’t it? We always had each other and home was a safe harbor.
I know you feel so sad and bad today guys but I saved something for now that I want to share with you that happened a couple of years ago (about a year after diagnosis). I had a dream….no I don’t mean Martin Luther’s King’s “I Had a Dream Speech.
I hope you’re familiar with the Rainbow Bridge but if you’re not there’s printout here for that too so that you better understand. In my dream I died and went to the Rainbow Bridge . Sam, Bankier and Chippy my pets were there. My God I was so happy….not just because I was “seeing them” again, but I felt such an intense feeling of “peace” within my heart and soul. I can’t explain it very well….When I woke up that euphoric feeling was so strong I wanted to go back to sleep and recapture the feeling.. I couldn’t. but it stayed with me for awhile. I wasn’t “afraid”; from a death or dieing perspective. I really wish I could explain this to you better…..
Many times over the past couple of years I have wanted to conjure up that “peace” again. It was so soothing. I wanted to go back there but try as I might I couldn’t. I finally saw it as a sort of message and it has helped me many times from a religious perspective. God was letting me know, in a way that I could understand, that all was well with my soul….just like the hymn and I’m going to “assume” ; as should you; that “same” feeling came back to me when I needed it. I’m sure it did.
And just one other thing……I’m now your angel. I WILL be there when you need me; all you need to do is talk to me, and talk to God, then look inside yourself. You WILL feel me I promise! All is well with my Soul, remember that and it will be for you too. Your work is FAR from finished in this life so get on with business.
I could also go in great length about my extended family here, or my friends, but I won’t. I will say however that I’m grateful that I got to come back to Nova Scotia and be around the familiar and around family these past 14 years. I’ve left them some letters as well. Coming full circle has brought Dave and me great pleasure. Roots; we all need them don’t we?
As for friends, especially those of you who live out our way……you folks are the most resourceful, hardworking individuals I’ve ever met. You’ve always had my respect and admiration. You welcomed Dave and I into the community even when you thought we were Americans (no offence Ted)
A special Thank You
Frank & Helen…..gotta love those “R”gust pearls!
Do I have any great words of wisdom for all of you here today? Not really; at least nothing you don’t already know…..except remember…to LOVE and to SHOW LOVE! Also Remember
Life is happening while you’re waiting for life to happen & Life is for the Living….so LIVE It!
I love you all and I’ll see you on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge…..
I am so glad you posted this as there was no way I could remember it all to post to the forum. Although the voice was that of the priest, You could feel Jackie's presence and hear her sharing her thoughts. Bye the way, the priest was 83 years old and had travelled from Georgia to carry out this wish for Jackie.