May 22, 2020 my momma died. She was my fist best friend, now she's gone! Who do I talk to? Who did I antique shopping with? My beautiful mother who loved life "More than LIFE itself" She was a rare beauty in her own way! And she could be so tough when needed. My mother was the Glue that held our family 👪 together! My mother was our mom and dad for all her life. She had a beautiful Smile and an incredible loud laugh.
I'm numb right now. IDK what to do anymore, I honestly feel like an orphan.
Post by lavishgail on May 26, 2020 13:44:17 GMT -5
Well wake and funeral is Thursday prayers at the funeral home, then to graveside to lay her down to peace! I know death is normal, but I was never taught how to grieve? Anyone? I mean I lost my dad at 17 years old I was just a kid helping mom rear my younger brother and younger sister. I cry but when all is said and done then what? I cant understand how you feel better? Well I'm a grown up I'll get it. I have her funeral notice for news paper see if I can share it?
Dearest Gail - losing a parent is so difficult. 😢 I lost both my folks many years ago...and I did feel like an orphan at the age of 42. I was no one’s little girl anymore. Your mom is still with you...she lives in your heart and your beautiful spirit. ❤️
Post by lavishgail on May 27, 2020 11:32:48 GMT -5
I know Sallybrown, but I can't feel her right now, I can't smell her. I'm so lost. My poor brothers and sister
I couldnt get her write up on here, I'll try again.
I'm teaching my kids now, how bad this feels, my mom and I talked about if one goes be4 the other to leave the window open just a little so she can come in. Not yet. God is holding my suffering mother and she will be ok he is healing her. She will and has been around me! This is very hard as I'm a light worker and feel everyone's pain!
Really sorry to hear this news, Gail. It is difficult to have a parent pass away. We all experience it, but it is never a good time when it occurs. Eventually we all get over it, but it leaves a hole in your life and your heart.
Thank you all so much. I'm not going to lie to you, Now that my momma is gone feel no reason to even get up! My grands are getting older they don't get here much anymore, Jessica their mom came yesterday so we can meet her boyfriend. He seems very nice. Th for 🙏🙏 We all need them at some point. I love all of you thank you so much.
Ty Sallybrown.. I know she is with me bc when I'm thinking of her I feel her. If I close my eyes I try to smell her. I can hear her now, you and you're nose! Haha. Oh well. I don't feel like my mom went to heaven yet? I feel like she flying aground to all the places she dreamed of going! I told her to have lots of fun!
Post by lavishgail on Sept 23, 2020 22:35:55 GMT -5
Omg, We are going away to the cape my family and us. Pray for me that I'll be ok to go? My chest x-ray was slightly better then last one. Holy that was when I was in the hospital. We shall see? Love all Thinking of you 🍀♥💃💃💃
Post by lavishgail on Sept 30, 2020 6:53:50 GMT -5
Thank you Jim and Sallybrown! My beautiful trip I thought would be great to be with my family turned out to be the trip from hell. My family is so screwed up! Omg 😲. My mom def. Was not there she couldn't handle it. I have not felt my mom at all. My sister is not right none of them are. They all told me more or less to get over mom they did! I was with the people from hell. Never again. Thanks for you're nice thoughts. I love you guy's!
Post by lavishgail on Sept 30, 2020 7:52:50 GMT -5
Thanks Jim. My "sister" she is not right in so many ways. I'm from now on staying away from all of them . long story, so ridiculous! I can't even talk about it. And I rather not, don't want to be Judged . Take ❤ care of you!
Ouch! 😵 It really hurts when a friend or family member turns on us. Who knows what problems this woman has... And as for your sister and brother...ugh! Hard when the people closest to us seem to want to see us fail...instead of being a support.
For your own sanity and peace of mind, you have to let this roll off your back. These people won’t change so you have to change your reaction to them. Possibly limit contact?
Stay true to yourself. You know who you are and what values you hold. It is so obvious you have a heart of gold and a generous spirit. Often times people mistake niceness for weakness. Prove them wrong!
You are loved and treasured for your goodness and open-spirit. As my grandfather would say, “Don’t let the bxxxtards bring you down. You are better than them.”
I will say extra prayers 🙏 for you, my friend! Wishing you strength and peace of mind. Find a calm place for yourself during this storm. And remember this to shall pass. Love you! 💕
Post by lavishgail on Oct 10, 2020 14:01:43 GMT -5
Thank you for your words of wisdom! I really think the world of you and well ty so much for being my friend and trying to understand. I know your hearing only from my side but they all talked about the fact that bc I was * This way * what ever way that is? I'm on "to much medicine" what the heck do they know about what I take for meds? I'm sure my brother told them it was a lot! Steroids keep me alive and when I tried telling the mother of my brother's mate she rolled her eyes up in her head? This woman is almost 70. The only reason my brother even knows what I've taken for meds is bc back in 2011 and upwards I stayed with my mom and brother bc it was closer to the hospital, and at that time they did not know what to give me so they had me on the life support machine. Most of my meds keep me alive. If I stop them like they want me to I'll surly die. If my mom was here none of this would of happened! My mother didn't care for that fake family! Oh ty so much Sally.
I thought my mom was being kind of meaning when she told me a few things about that woman, of course she was right and I was blind! I really need to grow up! Xxoo
Post by lavishgail on Oct 11, 2020 22:10:23 GMT -5
Boy that was mean of me! God tried to warn me bc I kept telling hubby I didn't feel like going, but he thought it would be good for us but I had a feeling something was up. Oh well, I've decided to take you up on you idea's Sally, I'm going to let it roll off my shoulders like I normally do. My brothers b-day is November 9th I will go a little early give him his gift then sneak out later when everyone is busy. And never share thoughts and stories with my sister ever again. It only took me till now to really hear this from someone besides my hubby. Thank you so very much Sally. I will always love them but I'm going to stay away now. You know, just take each day as it comes. I wrote you a couple of messages idk if you saw them? But take care my sweet Sallybrown, xoxo
I'm still mournin my Mother. I'm getting better though. My brothers and sister said not to? How can you not? We must be going through the stages differently? I'm at the stage where I'm mad at mom for leaving. But I'm really not . I know deep inside if she could she would still be here!
Post by lavishgail on Feb 11, 2021 19:18:05 GMT -5
Thank you so much Sally. I do miss her so much, but she did all her work here. time for her to rest now! Each day does get better. I have no up and go. Nothing really ever feels good to me! I just wish I had something to look forward to. I mean I know my grandchildren need me still. Ok enough ttyl. Love me!