From Bill

[justbill]

Hi All;

Just a line to say “I'm living.” I'm not yet amongst the dead.

I don't want to bore you with details, but I will anyway,
Jenny and I have been having a rough year.

My Jenny had an extreme exacerbation of her Mennieres syndrome,
and was in a wheelchair for two months. She now requires a walker to get around outside.

For the last few years on top of COPD I've been dealing with prostate problems. Two surgeries and a lot of pain later it seems to have been beaten, just in time for me to be diagnosed with bladder cancer. Three doctors have refused treatment because of my weakened condition. They feel I would not survive the treatment.

Jenny is a rock. Without her I would surely have given up. She will
not allow it. When I feel that every morning a new terror is just
waiting for me to open my eyes the loving touch and gentle voice
of my Jenny gives me strength to battle another day. When a day
has been particularly difficult, Jenny's courage keeps me going.
Courage is not always loud and noisy, At night I sometimes believe I can hear her quiet voice in my head saying,
“We will try again to-morrow.”

The doctors gave up on us so we've turned to alternative medicine. It's an interesting battle and I'm enjoying it. We've only been at it for a few weeks but I'm already feeling better.

I have been asked, “Why aren't you angry?” “You should be angry.” Sometimes I feel I have the right to be angry, but I don't like anger. I have witnessed the the cruel things said and done when anger rears it's ugly head. I don't believe that anger gives us the right to be cruel, so I tend to avoid it.

I absolutely must mention Jackie our Angel, with wings ruffled from caring so much for others, at cost to her own health that we can only imagine. Such a heart beats in very few. We (all of us) should feel blessed to know her.

She works harder than anyone I know and yet, finds time in her busy schedule to be concerned. Her phone calls, cards and touching gifts in the mail have given an enormous lift to our spirits when we needed it most.

I'm tired now and will take a rest. I'll drop in more often than I have for awhile, I may not say much but I'll be thinking of you.

I'm not sure if this is the proper place to post this but, what the hey.

Bill

[bobbioh]

Bill Im so sorry to hear of yours and Jennys troubles. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[mary57]

Bill, I'm so sorry to hear that you and Jenny have had such a bad year. Even so you still keep a positive attitude, with a little help from your friends. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. May I share a Shaker proverb I read today? "Heaven and earth are threads from one loom." I believe we are all on the same journey, but at our own speed.

[lynn]

PRAYERS.
For you and your beloved.
lynn

[rvtoni]

So sorry to hear your news. I'll be praying for you both.

[Blossom/Jackie W.]

Bill and Jenny...

I've wrestled this afternoon; you know....
what/how to say things.... I'm still not sure...

Look; In a person's lifetime they get to meet and have the "privilige" of interacting with "sincere", "down to earth" good people who, as a couple, (you and Jenny) regardless of trials, are still "in love" and are warm and caring and giving. Not a small feat in today's world IMO...
Whooo;
that was a long breath on my part.
And; I feel I'm the priviliged one.

You and Jenny are the epitomy of "lovers". Nowadays that might be seen sexually but .... in this point in time in all of our lives (your friends here) , love is not defined that way. You both could teach todays yuppies a LOT!!!

I am enjoying that privilige of friendship, and believe it or not it's helping me to "focus" a bit more on the important things in life. So; I "thank you!" And; I'm honored, humbled and frankly; a bit teary eyed.

Thank you for finding the energy and strength today to update your family here. I know it took a lot......

From my to yours and Jenny.... and from your extended family on this forum.....

We love you both!

[John]

Bill & Jenny I was "visiting" as I have the weekend off ,but I couldn't get by this one .Bill You & Jenny are in my prayers & definitely will be in my next trip to the shrine . Hopefully on Mon.Ive been nursing a cold since Friday . The way you care for each other is always an inspiration for me

[Deleted]

Dear Bill & Jenny.

You two are the most loving people, I am so happy I know you Bill and Jenny, through Bill's love for you. I am going to keep good thoughts and lots of prayers for you both, you are so very lucky to have each other. Bill I agree about your thoughts on anger, such awaste of engery. Always have hope. Love you both, your friend Linndie

[sandy07]

Bill....you and your sweet Jenny will be in my prayers. We can only hope to have the love and concern you two have for each other. You really are "one".

I will pray that the alternatives that you are doing will work well for you. They have for many people.

I know you will enjoy each others' love for a long time yet. Thinking of you always.

[susanny]

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Life sure hands us some hard battles at times, and you've been having your share. It breaks my heart to hear of what you two have had to deal with, but you seem to be just as strong as ever, even stronger. I think of you often and am was so glad to see your name on the post. 'just bill' doesn't seem to be special enough for you, though. You are not 'just' anything, and I'm sure Jenny would agree.

I have high hopes for this alternative treatment you are doing for your cancer. Did you find somebody locally to help you out? I'm also sorry that Jenny went through such a bad time, but glad that she can be out of the wheelchair again.

I always get a tug on my heart when I hear you speak about Jenny. Your relationship is so close to the description of my and my husband's, and it is so nice to hear that your love continues to grow. You two were really blessed when you found each other.

As for Jackie, yep, she's the tops! She would go to the ends of the earth to help out one of her friends. There are very few people in the world as unselfish and giving as Jackie. Thank God for her!

Hope to see you around more often. I missed you soooo much. Give Jenny a hug and tell her we love her, too. Sue

[aero63]

Bill

So sad to read of your troubles. I know you had mentioned about your troubles before and thank you for having the courage to share in more detail with us here.

I sure hope this new way of medicine continues to work.

Sending caring and healing thoughts your way.

[justbill]

Thank you everyone, for your kind thoughts and prayers.

Because of her mennieres syndrome, my Jenny cannot
watch TV or a computer screen. The movement on screen
can trigger an attack.

When I come into the forum Jenny sits in a comfy chair with
her books and listens as I read your comments. Your wonderful
welcome put a quiet,warm smile on her lips for which I am
eternally in your debt. She has asked to have your words
printed so she can read them again a little later.

Again, we thank you all and will pray for you each and every one.

Now for a short rest to just sit quietly and bask in your warmth.

Love to all, Jenny & Bill